Book Review: All Your Perfects by Colleen Hoover

Goodreads: All Your Perfects
Genre: Romance, Contemporary Fiction, New Adult
Rating: ★★★★½

Quinn and Graham’s perfect love is threatened by their imperfect marriage. The memories, mistakes, and secrets that they have built up over the years are now tearing them apart. The one thing that could save them might also be the very thing that pushes their marriage beyond the point of repair.All Your Perfects is a profound novel about a damaged couple whose potential future hinges on promises made in the past. This is a heartbreaking page-turner that asks: Can a resounding love with a perfect beginning survive a lifetime between two imperfect people?

The minute I started this book I knew that there was no way that I was putting it down until I read the final word. Turns out, I was very right. I started reading late Friday evening and finished the book around 4:00AM Saturday. I wasn’t prepared for the onslaught of feelings I experienced reading this, but I shouldn’t have been surprised because Colleen Hoover has a knack for eliciting those strong emotions and reactions with her stories.

“If you only shine light on your flaws, all your perfects will dim.”

All Your Perfects is a romance story of a marriage that’s full of love, miscommunication, and heartbreak. CoHo depicts a very real relationship struggle that perhaps many married couples who long to be parents can relate to. The story opens up to an uncomfortable and painfully heartbreaking situation involving Quinn and Graham. Do you believe in fate or soul mates? I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned this a few times now but being a hopeless romantic, as much as I think I don’t want to believe it, I do. I love the idea that someone(s) out there is made for you. The story alternates between then, when they first meet, how they get together and their really beautiful friendship and love. (I know I sounded really corny just then but their relationship was great, okay?) We also get the now and while the love is still there, these chapters are full of unbearable anguish, heartbreak and loneliness, as Quinn and Graham are reaching the breaking point in their marriage because they are unable to get pregnant.

This novel sheds light on an issue that isn’t normally openly discussed: infertility. Being single and falling on the side of not wanting children, I wasn’t sure that I’d be able to relate to the story or the characters. Of course that was true to a certain extent because I can’t even begin to imagine what it would feel like to continuously try and not succeed in having a baby. How people can be so insensitive to such things. How the pressure you put on yourself to make it happen can make you question your worth and your purpose. However, CoHo writes her characters, their emotions and experiences in such a way that is so palpable, it doesn’t matter what your status is or whether you want a child or not, you can feel Quinn’s anguish, fear and feelings of inadequacy, as well as Graham’s constant love, pain and longing. I actually learned a lot from reading this.

This isn’t a perfect love story between two flawless characters. While I admittedly fell in love with Graham’s character from the start, there was a point where I wanted to hurl my Kindle across the room because of something his character did, and frankly, at that point, I was sure I hated him. Quinn’s character was also so mired in her depression at not being able to conceive that it was often so painful to continue reading. But their relationship was what made them even more real. While the story ultimately ends predictably, it didn’t take away from my enjoyment of it; in fact, how they endure the struggles and the very dark points, and managed to find a way back to themselves made me love this story even more. I thought CoHo did a great job tying in the missing pieces between now and then to deliver a beautiful conclusion. Let me tell you, the last 20% of the book really had my water works flowing on overtime!

This was such a touching story and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Also, can I please, please, please have a Graham in my life? K, thanks.

Have you read All Your Perfects or is it on your TBR?
Are you a CoHo fan? What’s your favourite CoHo book?

Book Review: Pride by Ibi Zoboi

Goodreads: Pride
Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary Fiction, Retelling, Romance
Rating: ★★★½

Zuri Benitez has pride. Brooklyn pride, family pride, and pride in her Afro-Latino roots. But pride might not be enough to save her rapidly gentrifying neighborhood from becoming unrecognizable. When the wealthy Darcy family moves in across the street, Zuri wants nothing to do with their two teenage sons, even as her older sister, Janae, starts to fall for the charming Ainsley. She especially can’t stand the judgmental and arrogant Darius. Yet as Zuri and Darius are forced to find common ground, their initial dislike shifts into an unexpected understanding. But with four wild sisters pulling her in different directions, cute boy Warren vying for her attention, and college applications hovering on the horizon, Zuri fights to find her place in Bushwick’s changing landscape, or lose it all.

I was ready to love this book but I thought it just fell a bit short for me. Don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy reading this remix of one of my favorite novels (of all time), but I couldn’t quite relate with the characters and I was left wanting a deeper connection to the story. However, I do think that Zoboi did an amazing job of illustrating Bushwick and Brooklyn, and the changing times in those neighbourhoods, and I especially appreciated how the Haitian-Dominican culture of the Benitez family was so well-woven into the storyline. It’s such an important part of Zuri Benitez’s character, and I loved that you could really feel how much pride she had in her roots and heritage. Seeing Bushwick through Zuri’s eyes brought out the vibrancy of her block and the people living in it. It’s been a while since I’ve read a re-telling of this classic, so it was exciting for me to see how Zoboi would shape the story and it was a delight to see how the various characters appeared in this remix.

I thought the writing was done well and my favorite parts to read were Zuri’s poetry! They’re such good poems and I think they spoke more to me as a reader than the full narrative. These poems made me wish that I was listening to the audiobook because they were so powerful and I can imagine how much more impactful it would be hearing them spoken out loud.

While Zuri’s voice was quite distinct and she embodied the “Liz” character well, I often found myself getting frustrated and annoyed at her prideful behaviour. Though I understand that her attitude came from a place of fear and anger at the changes going on around her, I couldn’t help thinking that it came across as petty and spiteful a lot of the time, and that her inability to look past her fear was what made her character growth quite slow. The frustration with her attitude was what made this read less enjoyable for me. One of my favorite characters was Madrina, who reminded me of Blix, who is one of my favorite characters from Matchmaking for Beginners. They had such matronly auras that soothed, comforted and left you feeling like everything was going to be okay. Zuri’s strong bond with Madrina was also a defining trait of her character and I think ultimately it’s because of her wisdom that Zuri’s character growth really pushed forward. I was also hoping to learn more about Darius’ character and for him to have more character growth but as it is, he really felt more like just a romantic bystander in Zuri’s story, and this also took a bit out of the romance between them.

Overall, this was an enjoyable coming-of-age romance that portrayed modern day issues of socioeconomic change, class and cultural identity very well. It had a believably sweet and satisfying ending to Zuri and Darius’ story. I’m glad that I read it and I’m looking forward to reading other books by Ibi Zoboi, especially American Street!

Have you read Pride or is it on your TBR? What’d you think of it?
What are some of your favourite Pride and Prejudice retellings?

Book Review: Normal People by Sally Rooney

Goodreads: Normal People
Genre: Contemporary Fiction

Panda Rating:

(4 pandas)

Connell and Marianne grow up in the same small town in rural Ireland. The similarities end there; they are from very different worlds. When they both earn places at Trinity College in Dublin, a connection that has grown between them lasts long into the following years.

This is an exquisite love story about how a person can change another person’s life – a simple yet profound realisation that unfolds beautifully over the course of the novel. It tells us how difficult it is to talk about how we feel and it tells us – blazingly – about cycles of domination, legitimacy and privilege. Alternating menace with overwhelming tenderness, Sally Rooney’s second novel breathes fiction with new life. 


CW/TW: major depression, self-harm and suicidal thoughts, depictions of physical and sexual abuse, questionable consent, bondage.

This has been difficult to review because I was so prepared to dislike it only to end up really enjoying it. After reading both of her novels, Rooney’s writing style is very clear to me — simple, not very descriptive, astute observations about people, deep shuddering thoughts, lack of punctuation for speech. It’s not for everybody, and I know when I read Conversations with Friends, it was one of the things I really disliked; I felt nothing when I was ready to feel everything! Normal People was written in the same way, her characters even had similar attributes, and yet, I still managed to enjoy it way more than I could the former. I’m not even sure I can tell you why besides the fact the characters were much more likable but I’m quite thrilled to be proven wrong about not liking this!

I’m trying hard to articulate my thoughts in a way that flows well, but I’m finding it really tough because of the mood the book has left me in. There are some mild spoilers in this review but it’s quite difficult to write something without giving away some of the interactions. So the first thing that comes to mind is that it made me feel profoundly sad and slightly depressed (the CW at the bottom of this post is no joke, especially if you’re a sensitive reader like me). I don’t think it’s bad that the book made me feel this way but please consider this when you’re deciding to read it or not. I actually liked it because of how deeply I connected to the emotions and how I came to care for them so much; I was really invested in Connell and Marianne, which made it a more difficult but enjoyable read. If you can’t tell, I had lots of contradicting thoughts and feelings about it but simply put: I really liked it and I think it will stay with me for a while.

There’s not much of a plot or storyline to the book. As I mentioned above, Rooney’s style is very simple and her writing is a contrasting mix of detachment and very deep and intense feeling. At times this was such a painful read because the story was so packed with dark and heavy emotions but there was also an apathy to the text. I often had the urge to scream or cry because of how honest the writing was. Rooney created such raw and real characters with them and I completely empathize with what they went through. They are far from perfect but that’s also part of what made them more likable.

The book follows Marianne and Connell as they go from high school in a small Irish town to college in Dublin. In their hometown, Connell is middle class and extremely popular. Marianne is rich but considered a freak and is frequently bullied. When Marianne and Connell strike up a friends-with-benefits arrangement, they both agree to not act differently in public (i.e. they continue to ignore the other’s existence) but they find solace in their relationship and realize it’s when they can most be themselves. The book is a character study of these two very dysfunctional young people who can’t step out of each other’s orbits, no matter how far apart they go, but who can never summon the courage to be honest with their feelings for each other. The nature of their on-again-off-again relationship goes through so many repetitive cycles of friendship and romance, and even though their dependency and willingness to indulge the other was often unhealthy and problematic, you can’t help but feel invested in and comforted by what they have.

They are both mired in their own depressions but for different reasons and to varying degrees. Class and social status play a defining role in their relationship, with one always feeling like they’re less adjusted, more awkward, less popular, and more alone than the other. Marianne’s is an all consuming emptiness that’s (self)perpetuated by her masochism. Unlike Connell she doesn’t seek anyone’s approval but she has deep seated issues with playing a role that confirms her own views of how she fits in. There were so many times where I felt frustrated with her character and the decisions she’d make, but at the same time, I longed to help her. I was hoping that she would’ve experienced more growth by the end, but in a way it was also fitting that she didn’t because it meant keeping the cycle going. Connell’s character was also far from perfect, but he grew a lot throughout the novel and I found I enjoyed experiencing it. Seeing him go from this awful character in high school who was so consumed by what others thought of him that he treated Marianne like trash, to confronting his depression and anxiety and learning to be more communicative was very rewarding. I don’t think he was with Marianne for the right reason — the “hero complex” was strong with this one — but I do think he was the most honest with himself with her, and that her support really helped him grow. Even if he very much used their relationship to satisfy his own ego.

One of the main frustrations I had was the epic miscommunication between the two. The misunderstandings between what they were saying and what they heard was so infuriating. Oftentimes they never really listened to each other. Yet time and again, they’d fall back together and I’d be there cheering them on; feeling hopeful that they’ve grown enough to overcome their distrust and problems, and to finally FINALLY find happiness with each other.

This would’ve been a five star read for me but several reasons, especially the ambiguous ending, brought it down to a four. Can I please reiterate how much I don’t like these types of open-ended conclusions where it feels the characters are cut off mid-thought or action? I wasn’t ready for the book to end when it did and the abruptness left me full of angst over all the ‘unfinished business’.

SPOILER THOUGHTS

In a way I do understand why Rooney left it like that because both characters, Marianne especially, still had a lot to overcome between themselves for there to be a happy ending, and that’s if there ever could be one between them. It really hurt to see how Marianne accepted the happiness that Connell brought into her life over the last several months, but was so quickly willing to let it go due in large part (I believe) to her masochism and how she feels the only time she is worth anything is if she’s feeling pain. It’s very sad, and again perpetuates the cycle between the two, but I think of how Marianne feels he won’t come back and I do believe that if Connell leaves he will find a better life for himself on the other side of the pond.

END SPOILER THOUGHTS

Sorry for the ramble 😬Have you read Normal People or Rooney’s debut, Conversations with Friends? If you read either of them, I’d be curious to know your thoughts!

#MiniReviews Monday with A Lost Man, A Summer Friendship & Naughty Princesses!

In several attempts to get over my two-book hangover, I actually finished and started a few books over the last few days. These “palate cleansers” took a few days for me to get through but as we’re starting a brand new week, I think my being is finally ready to move on from the outback!

The Lost Man by Jane Harper – ★★★★.5☆

Honestly, this deserves more than a mini-review and I’ll probably post my full review later on in the week, but to cut to the chase: Jane Harper also stole my heart with this story (hence the two-book hangover). This was another slow burn mystery set in the outback and that was just as atmospheric as her debut–the rich imagery put me right back in the unforgiving heat where I lost myself completely to this story. CW: physical and sexual abuse. The Bright family was full of complex characters that were endearing, frustrating and terrifying. My theories about whodunit were (of course) dead wrong but it only served to make the reveals a surprising whirlwind that delighted me when it all finally clicked. I also found myself delighted to stumble across a connection between the characters in The Dry and for a short flashback, we got to revisit Kiewarra and learn more about a family there. Harper did a fantastic job bringing all the elements together and the final scene, although maybe a little too easily resolved, left me feeling hopeful about second chances and a fresh start for the Bright family.

The Goodbye Summer (ARC) by Sarah Van Name – ★★★☆☆

I will be posting my full review later this week closer to the publication date (01 May 2019). I think this is the first YA novel I’ve read in a while where I can say that I get people who say they no longer read YA because it’s just not targeted to them. While I didn’t dislike it, I know I would’ve enjoyed the story much more had I read this in middle/high school. This was very character driven but I unfortunately found myself feeling frustrated with Caroline, the MC, more than anything else. I did enjoy the blossoming summer turned lifetime friendship between Caroline and Georgia. It was a solid, supporting and positive relationship that changed the MC for the better, and her obvious growth as a result was satisfying to witness. That said, the pace was slow and I thought how it was written made this better suited to be a TV show rather than a book. Despite the pace, this was a fairly short read that I’m sure many young adults will be able to enjoy and perhaps relate to!

The Naughty Princess Club (Series) by Tara Sivec – ★★★★☆ (Overall)

At the Stroke of Midnight (Book 1) was the first book I picked up after finishing both Jane Harper’s novel and I honestly couldn’t have picked a more different book if I tried! 😂 It really took awhile for me to get into the story and I almost stopped at one point, but I’m so glad that I pushed through because I ended up loving this series! The books were super sexy, romantic, funny and actually very empowering. It was great to read about Cindy, Ariel and Belle, as they worked hard to get themselves out of their “men-made funks” by starting a home stripping business called The Naughty Princess Club. I loved their friendship and how they supported each other throughout the series and their close bond reminded me of what I have with my besties. Sure, it was a bit cheesy at times but it had me breaking out in belly-aching laughs so often and made me feel lighter after each book ended! If I had to pick a favorite of the three it’d have to be Kiss the Girl (Book 3) about Ariel (obviously), even though she was actually my least favorite character at the start. I related the most with her issues, but I also really loved the sweet, easy-going and supportive relationship between her and Eric! Fair warning though: if you’re into steamy reads, this series isn’t for you!

Hope you enjoyed my mini-reviews! Have you read any of these? I hope you’re having a great/good Monday wherever you are in the world!

Book Review: The Dreamers by Karen Thompson Walker

Goodreads: The Dreamers
Genre: Fiction, Science Fiction
Rating: ★★★★☆

One night in an isolated college town in the hills of Southern California, a first-year student stumbles into her dorm room, falls asleep–and doesn’t wake up. She sleeps through the morning, into the evening. Her roommate, Mei, cannot rouse her. Neither can the paramedics who carry the girl away, nor the perplexed doctors at the hospital. Then a second girl falls asleep, and then a third, and panic takes hold of the college and spreads to the town. As the number of cases multiplies, classes are canceled. A quarantine is established. Mei, an outsider in the hierarchy of dorm life, finds herself thrown together with an eccentric, idealistic classmate. A psychiatrist summoned from Los Angeles attempts to make sense of the phenomenon as it spreads. Those infected, she discovers, are displaying unusual levels of brain activity, higher than has ever been recorded before. They are dreaming heightened dreams–but of what?

I’ve been itching to read The Dreamers ever since I saw the book (cover) on IG earlier this year, and then I read the blurb and honestly, how could I resist?! I can’t really pinpoint why I love this cover so much; maybe it’s the combination of text and bright colors over a dark background? Whatever it is, it works for me. So, to say that I was excited to finally find this book a few weeks ago is probably an understatement. At the same time though, The Dreamers has been so incredibly hyped on IG that I also felt a little hesitant about reading it because there’s always a chance (however slim) that I will find the book disappointing. But when Brenda over at The Traveling Sisters told me they were doing a group read, I didn’t hesitate to join in, and I’m so glad I did because this book definitely needed talking about afterwards!

The first night I fell asleep after finishing this, I had the strangest dreams courtesy of the book’s ending. Clearly, the story had gotten into my head, but truth be told, I wasn’t really sure how I felt about it. This was unlike any science fiction that I’ve ever read. When I think of sci-fi, I generally think Michael Crichton–which is great storytelling, but also very heavy on facts, terms that I can’t pronounce and other physic/chemistry related details that oftentimes leave my head spinning. The Dreamers was basically the opposite of that. It’s written in a slow, slightly melancholic and detached way, with alluring dreamlike quality prose. It’s entirely fitting for the title and what the book is about, but it also means that the pace moves at a fairly sleepy pace. Honestly, if the story was any less interesting, I probably would’ve fallen asleep multiple times or really dreaded getting through it. As this is my first KTW book, I didn’t know what her writing would be like, but this was the first “oh” moment when I realized that the book would be quite different to what I expected. It took me quite a while to really get into the story, but after a certain point when the epidemic started getting more intense, I was unable to put it down. While this dreamy-sleepy-storytelling is not normally my style, I found KTW’s prose compelling and too beautiful to leave unfinished.

The story was not so much about the what, how and why of the virus, but about the characters, their reactions, and the impact of the ensuing events on their lives. Told through multiple perspectives, there wasn’t much character development and as a result, you don’t become very invested in any of them; but it was interesting to experience the epidemic through the various viewpoints. KTW highlights the human capacity to endure, and how high-intensity crisis situations can bring people together or pull them apart. I thought this was a pretty unique angle to take in approaching a sci-fi. During the discussion someone asked how we’d react in such a situation and I realized I would probably end up being that anxious, hot mess that everyone wishes would fall asleep–I’d be all panic and absolutely no disco 😂

As we follow the story, we learn that the sleepers experience unprecedented levels of brain activity, higher even than a person experiences in an awake state, but how is this possible and what does it mean? While the question is never really answered, the exploration of memories, dreams, and time, while sometimes abstract and philosophical, was thought-provoking. I enjoyed mulling over why certain people experienced events very differently and trying to decipher what was real and what wasn’t.

In the end though, there were many questions left unanswered and I think that was my biggest frustration with the book. It felt incomplete, like there was no resolution to the story, even knowing that answering the why and how wasn’t necessarily the point. I’m still curious about the message KTW was trying to send or make us understand with this book. With a few days to process the story, I realize I enjoyed The Dreamers a lot more than I initially thought, and I think it’s a story I will continue to think about long after I’ve finished the last page.

Have you read The Dreamers yet or is it on your TBR? I’m curious to know your thoughts! Leave a comment down below and let’s chat 🙂

Book Review: Maybe in Another Life by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Goodreads: Maybe in Another Life
Genre: Contemporary Fiction, Romance, New Adult, Chicklit,
Rating: ★★★★☆

At the age of twenty-nine, Hannah Martin still has no idea what she wants to do with her life. She has lived in six different cities and held countless meaningless jobs since graduating college. On the heels of leaving yet another city, Hannah moves back to her hometown of Los Angeles and takes up residence in her best friend Gabby’s guestroom. Shortly after getting back to town, Hannah goes out to a bar one night with Gabby and meets up with her high school boyfriend, Ethan. Just after midnight, Gabby asks Hannah if she’s ready to go. A moment later, Ethan offers to give her a ride later if she wants to stay. Hannah hesitates. What happens if she leaves with Gabby? What happens if she leaves with Ethan?

It’s here that the story splits and we get two concurrent storylines that follow what happens if Hannah chooses to stay or go. As the stories play out, Hannah and the people around her have to deal with huge life-altering events that have big consequences for what happens next. Maybe in Another Life not only questions what’s meant to be in this life and who we’re meant to be with, but it also makes you think about where and what home really is. It’s so easy to think that only the big decisions you make affect the course of your life, when in reality all the decisions you make have an effect — and you can’t simply just wish the bad away, because from the bad eventually comes good.

“I think I have to believe that life will work out the way it needs to. If everything that happens in the world is just a result of chance and there’s no rhyme or reason to any of it, that’s just too chaotic for me to handle. I’d have to go around questioning every decision I’ve ever made, every decision I will ever make. If our fate is determined with every step we take . . . it’s too exhausting. I’d prefer to believe that things happen as they are meant to happen.”

This book had me feeling all the feels. Being only a year older than Hannah, I definitely felt for her. Although I have a steady job and I don’t jump from city to city looking for a place I belong, I too still don’t know where ‘home’ really is and I’m not sure whether the direction my life is heading, is the direction I want it to go. So much of Hannah’s character resonated with me and I constantly found myself rooting for her (and Gabby)! For the most part, I tend to have a slightly cynical view of the world and of life, but there’s a part of me that really also believes that whatever is meant to be will be—if it’s gonna happen it will happen—and Hannah’s belief in that really touched me. Surprisingly, I found very few characters in this book unlikable. Although many of them, even the main ones, don’t experience much growth throughout the story; as it centers on Hannah. They all managed to worm their way into my heart, except for the asshole characters of which there’s ONE BIG ONE. This obviously contributed to making the book a more enjoyable and easier reading experience.

While the story primarily focuses on the relationship between lovers, it also explores friendships and the relationship between parents and their children. I absolutely loved the friendship between Hannah and Gabby. Gabby is the steady, level-headed, politically correct friend to Hannah’s spontaneous all-over-the-place clumsiness. There was so much love and support between them, and even at Hannah’s worse, there was no condescension or judgement on Gabby’s part, which I think is rare to find (not only in real life but in story friendships too). Their type of bond transcends traditional friendship and makes them more like sisters and family; which considering Hannah’s home situation, is honestly not that difficult to do. The relationship between Hannah and her family made me profoundly sad. I honestly didn’t and still don’t understand her parent’s decision to not take her along with them. To say that they’re stuck in their own privileged bubble would be an understatement, even though they didn’t have bad intentions, it’s kind of incredible that they were so obtuse. While it’s clear that the Martin family have love for each other, it’s obvious that Hannah doesn’t feel like her parents and sister really have much of a place in her life, and that’s evidenced by the fact that they weren’t really around for the majority of the big life changing moments in either of the stories.

In a way I kind of feel like loving how both storylines ends is a little bit like cheating — it’s not, I know, but it’s like getting to have your cake and eat it too, because you don’t normally get two very different but both very happy endings in real life. To be honest, I don’t think I’ve ever read a novel that’s told in this way (except the ‘choose your own adventure’ types and that’s completely different), and I wasn’t expecting to love it but in the end I really did. I honestly love the concept of parallel universes and the playing out of actions on the “other side of the coin”. There’s a quote in this book that had my goosebumps rising and that so perfectly sums up the experience of the book.

“The world is splitting further and further into an infinite number of parallel universes where everything that could happen is happening. It’s entirely possible that every time we make a decision, there is a version of us out there somewhere who made a different choice. An infinite number of versions of ourselves are living out the consequences of every single possibility in our lives. What I’m getting at here is that I know there may be universes out there where I made different choices that led me somewhere else, led me to someone else. […] And my heart breaks for every single version of me that didn’t end up with you.”

Have you read Maybe in Another Life or is it on your TBR?

Book Review: The Child Finder by Rene Denfeld

Goodreads: The Child Finder (Naomi Cottle #1)
Genre: Thriller, Mystery, Suspense
Rating: ★★★★☆

Three years ago, Madison Culver disappeared when her family was choosing a Christmas tree in Oregon’s Skookum National Forest. She would be eight years old now—if she has survived. Desperate to find their beloved daughter, certain someone took her, the Culvers turn to Naomi, a private investigator with an uncanny talent for locating the lost and missing. Known to the police and a select group of parents as The Child Finder, Naomi is their last hope. Naomi’s methodical search takes her deep into the icy, mysterious forest in the Pacific Northwest, and into her own fragmented past. She understands children like Madison because once upon a time, she was a lost girl too.  As Naomi relentlessly pursues and slowly uncovers the truth behind Madison’s disappearance, shards of a dark dream pierce the defenses that have protected her, reminding her of a terrible loss she feels but cannot remember. If she finds Madison, will Naomi ultimately unlock the secrets of her own life? 

“This is something I know: no matter how far you have run, no matter how long you have been lost, it is never too late to be found.”

It’s been a few days since I’ve finished this book and for some reason I’m still not really sure what to say about it; but I know I did really enjoy it. This wasn’t a fast paced thriller but more of a slow burn mystery that explores the dark depths of humanity and the effects of abuse on children/adults.

Despite the dark and heavy tones and topic of this novel, Rene Denfeld writes in such a beautifully descriptive way that it oftentimes felt like I was reading a fairytale. The author incorporates the surrounding nature and environment of the Pacific Northwest into her story very well, and I think it really added to the genuine feeling of loneliness, and desperation of the characters, town and situation. There was a certain magical quality to the writing that makes it feel like you’re reading through a dream. I thought this was fitting because the story covers the ways in which a person, specifically a child, can deal with traumatic events that happen. One of the coping mechanisms that’s cited is that they’ll often create a magical (fairytale) world that essentially protects them from the reality of their situation. This novel really dives into the psychology of abuse and delivers a powerful story that’s full of emotion. Through many parts of the book I felt such a profound sadness and teared up at various emotionally touching scenes.

“She said we are all part of a secret club. Someday, she said, we will take over the earth. It will be people like us that save the world, she said: those who have walked the side of sorrow and seen the dawn.”

Rene Denfeld also surprised me with the way she chose to narrate this story. I was expecting to only explore one character’s perspective, but Denfeld introduces a very unique perspective that made the story all the more emotionally gut-punching. I don’t want to give more away by going into it, but I definitely think it made it more hard-hitting and impactful. I really enjoyed Naomi’s character. She’s strong, but at the same time, she is delicate and often has a childlike naivety to her interactions with certain people. It’s a clear example of how trauma and abuse in childhood can impact a person well into adulthood.

“Everyone needs faith: faith that even though the world is full of evil, a suitor will come and kiss us awake; faith that the girl will escape the tower, the big bad wolf will die, and even those poisoned by malevolence can be reborn, as innocent as purity itself.”

That said, while I enjoyed the many perspectives, I also wondered if it was necessary for certain characters because I felt their narratives did not really add anything substantial to the story — if these narratives weren’t included, I honestly don’t think it wouldn’t have made a big impact in the plot. There were times that I also found parts of the writing too abstract and a little too existential for my tastes. This was especially so for sections of Naomi’s narration, when she’s reflecting on her present and past, and I didn’t feel that it added anything of significance to the story. It just left me feeling slightly confused — was I missing something important in not understanding how to read between these lines? I didn’t think so, in the end!

Overall though, I really enjoyed this one. There will be a second book in the Naomi Cottle series coming out in October 2019, and I can’t wait to read it! 😊 I am also excited to read the author’s first book The Enchanted, which I’ve heard is a beautifully written and enchanting (ha) story, although ti does have a lot more magical realism in it.

Have you read anything by Rene Denfeld? Do you plan to?
Let me know in the comments — let’s chat books!

Book Review: My Sister, The Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite

Goodreads: My Sister, The Serial Killer
Genre: Crime-Thriller-Mystery, Africa, Contemporary Fiction
Rating: ★★★½ (out of 5)

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One evening, Korede gets a call from her younger sister Ayoola asking for her help. It’s a call she hoped she’d never receive again but, you know, life. Ayoola has killed another man and so Korede takes her cleaning supplies and goes to help her sister cover up a crime she claims was an act of self-defense. Does Korede believe her sister—even after three men have now died by Ayoola’s hand—or does she do something about it? Korede loves Ayoola, but she also wonders how her sister ended up this way–does she have more of their abusive father’s blood running through her veins, compared to Korede? Although she is fraught with worry about being found out, Korede is convinced the police don’t need to be involved; that is, until the day Ayoola attracts the attention of the man Korede loves and she finds herself torn between obligation to her sister, and a moral duty to not only protect the man she loves, but all the menfolk of Nigeria.

“Have you heard this one before? Two girls walk into a room. The room is in a flat. The flat is on the third floor. In the room is the dead body of an adult male. How do they get the body to the ground floor without being seen?”

I want to start by saying that I love the title and cover of this book. Not only is the cover eye-catching, but the title definitely piqued my interest and these elements alone were enough to convince me to read it! I had also seen it a few times on bookstagram this year, so there was additional interest generated from positive reviews, and I was definitely ready to pick it up.

Oyinkan Braithwaite writes a compelling novel that explores the complicated relationship between sisters, the moral dilemmas that come from being complicit in a crime and male impropriety that spans across cultures. The big question she was posed though was: Just how far would you go to protect the one(s) you love?

This was a fast and easy read filled with lots of dark humor, which left me laughing out loud just as often as I’d mumble with disappointment at Korede’s enabling and be appalled at Ayoola’s remorseless and sociopathic tendencies. I found the novel’s exploration of male impropriety rather amusing, actually. All the men in the book had little to no character outside from being caught in Ayoola’s orbit. She was the ‘centre of everyone’s universe’ and it didn’t matter that she was fickle, narcissistic, a cheater, and cared for little other than herself, men loved and wanted her because she was beautiful. Ayoola had it right, “all they want is a pretty face”, but this pretty face knew that and used it to her advantage, and clearly, to their detriment. Although, to be fair, even the women were enraptured by Ayoola’s beauty, so maybe the issue is more about society’s acceptance of beauty on the outside, excusing the ugly on the inside? Because in this book that outer beauty literally lets you get away with murder.

The most enjoyable part of the book for me was in the realness of sibling relationships, particularly between sisters. No matter how much you care for your sibling and no matter how well you get along, there are always feelings of insecurity, jealousy, and bitterness, but also of love and the overpowering need to protect and defend. Korede’s struggle to reconcile her morals with being a big sister whose instinct is to protect her little sister, captured the complexity of these relationships very well. As much as she felt bitterness and jealousy towards Ayoola for her beauty and for having a relationship with the man she loved, Korede never seriously thought of exposing her sister to the public, no matter how desperate she was to do so. That said, their relationship was very messed up and there was a lot of underlying resentment and obvious manipulation between the two.

What I struggled with the were the characters because I didn’t particularly like any of them. I wonder if that was done purposefully because they all had highly unfavorable character traits that made it difficult to find any redeeming qualities in them. Most of the times I wanted to slap them really hard in the faces and shake them “awake”.

Ayoola, as princess of the family, has gotten away with everything her whole life because of her looks. She’s conceited, narcissistic, and selfish (also, a serial killer) and takes everything for granted. It was astounding that even in the face of getting caught, she so vehemently denied any wrongdoing by spinning absurds tale that everyone seemed to believe because of her extraordinary beauty. Korede’s character was even worse because of how she enabled Ayoola by falling into the same ‘trap’ she criticized everyone else for. Despite knowing the manipulative nature of her sister, she still allowed herself to be taken advantage of and constantly stepped on. Although at times I felt sorry for her because of that, Korede had such a cold and impersonal, ‘holier than thou’ attitude towards everyone—boxing herself off from those who could have potentially been her allies—that it rubbed me the wrong way and made it difficult to feel sympathy for her character. The men, especially dreamy Dr. Tade, were thoughtless and shallow. Apparently, all men really care about are your looks and you can cheat, act crazy, be cold and heartless until it suits you to be warm, as much as you want as long as you’re beautiful. Even a brilliant, charming doctor is not exempt.

“We are hard wired to protect and remain loyal to the people we love. Besides, no one is innocent in this world. …’The most loving parents and relatives commit murder with smiles on their faces. They force us to destroy the person we really are: a subtle kind of murder.’”

I honestly thought that Korede would take a different route, especially after the (unsurprising) climax, so that was a bit of a letdown. But despite the unlikeable characters, I still enjoyed this read—which is rare for me to say because characters are everything! I do still feel like certain elements could have been explored better to give the book some more meat. Overall though, I thought this was a great debut by Braithwaite, that presents a daring, funny, but dark family drama that explored larger elements which other readers can perhaps relate to.

Have you read My Sister, the Serial Killer or is it on your TBR?